My new walking stick

Dearest Chumrades,

How are we all this fine Autumn day?

It is breezy and overcast with lashings of rain, with all the patriotic outpourings this year surely this is Britain! What what ......

I am currently on the injured list and on my way to some more sadistic physiotherapy with my therapist who makes the Marquis de Sade seem like Gary Wilmot.

The best thing about all this is my quest for a suitable cane. A point worth noting is that should I keep the accent on the positive and go for a cheaper but classy goth version or look long term with an investment into a steampunk cane?

There are so many decisions, but a mans accessories need appropriate consideration.

Naturally every year, the subject of headwear comes around and would love a bowler a hat. I work in the City of London so it could become either iconic or ironic?

I do prefer to lead than follow, so shall ponder some more.

Maybe a look of Jack the Ripper wearing country tweed meets Terry Thomas with a Jules Verne twist?

Now, I am feeling that ......

Toodle pip.


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Location:Colchester

Sit down wee

Every morning, I treat myself to a sit down wee. Now before you take away my manhood and castrate me, how many guys out there do this?

I do believe that gender roles have began to shift, there will always be the extreme stereotypes from the Stepford Wife to Dave from the pub, however these are few are far between.

There is nothing more satisfying than manscaping your chest hair or moisturising after a shave, it makes you feel good, improves skin and appearance.

This is not a new phenomenon, and since the era of the 'Dandy Gentleman' with the Prince Regent and the 'Romantics' of Byron, Keats et al .... Men have evolved for the long or short of it to impress Woman.

Men are peacocks, and we would preen ourselves in accordance of todays expectations. I mean look at the youth today!

There are of course caveats to the above, which can best described as The Gene Hunt era, when woman wanted strong powerful men, some wanted to cowtail to then. However, this generation was bourne from uncertainty and the ever changing political and social landscape. I have no doubt the this will be en vogue again.

So as I sit down for this wee, and deciding that this treat maybe be pushed to twice a day, just what are woman really looking for?

Who knows, is the answer as people are really fickle. I think all you can be is a situational man, which is all things to all people.

This is a survival technique and ensure that the human race continues, a man greatest strength is one that can go from Christian Grey to Cliff Richard to Gene Hunt in three potential courting conversations in one afternoon.

The art of happiness and staying together, depends on how happy the man is at playing that role for a long time maybe forever?

Wouldn't it be a wonderful irony, if woman did this too?

The mind boggles, now how do I shake this thing without touching it?

This sit down wee thing is overrated!


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Location:Colchester

September 10th 2001

I have blogged about this before, however feel it is apt to do so again, as its a different perspective.

It was September 2001, and my girlfriend at the time was on a girls holiday in Greece (found out she cheated on me during this time, which was nice) and was at home. I had some annual leave and last minute decided to do my PADI diving certificate.

I looked through the teletext (old school) and picked up a weeks holiday in Egypt staying at the Taba Hilton (since been blown up by Al Queda, in an unrelated incident).

Taba is on the border to Israel, Jordan and Saudi Arabia, so you can understand it is quite the hotbed of fundamentalism. This is of course retrospective information!

I flew into Eilat in Israel on September 2001 and was coached through the border to Egypt. I had some beef on the Israeli side as they were less than friendly about my various stamps in my passport from various Arab countries, but managed to convince them that I am not a terrorist and they let me past.

Then as I was going through the Egyptian customs the same drama unfolded, but they took my passport to check it out and gave me a receipt.

Now, I have been all over the world, and this was the most jumpy that I have ever seen border control.

I contacted my travel rep back at the hotel and they said it was routine, it seems that Israel marked my passport to alert the Egyptian authorities so that my background could be checked by interpol.

This was put to one side as was assured that I would get it back the next day.

The next day was a story that everybody knows, I watched the Twin Towers being hit live in the hotel bar with a Scottish lad of similar age, quite a sobering experience.

Even more so that this was accompanied by celebratory gun fire, AK47 to be precise outside the compound, which is what hotel was to be known from that point forward.

Now, we did not have Sky TV or Fox, but had Arab TV on, who were quick to pick up on the Bin Laden connection. I would say, that it was very frightening.

The only Arab or Asian leader who made much sense was General Musharaf from Pakistan, who claimed to be a pilot and he would of found it difficult to achieve what the terrorists did. This was not reported.

So there I was, in Egypt in a compound surrounded by gunfire into the sky with a Scotsman who decided this was an appropriate time to get pished.

The next day was erie as it appeared that all the borders where closed, lots of Israeli's where also trapped in the hotel. This is because there was a casino in the hotel and in Eilat I believed these were illegal.

The foreign offices of the majority of nations had started to evacuate all of the hotel, families and females first towards Cairo for special chartered planes to there home countries.

Myself, the Scotsman and around half a dozen Israeli's where left by ourselves in the Hilton, which was fully staffed.

This was quite fun, and for quite a few day used to sit at the foot of the Mount Sinai and watch the Israeli Navy go through provocative drills whilst the life of a young soldier was told to me through the experience of my new compound crew.

One thing that sprung to mind that some of the girls (yes they have a mixed army) where quite attractive. A man will always think of his penis, no matter how stressful or hopeless the situation is.

We drank, smoked Shisha, gambled, ate, listened to gunfire, snorkelled, watched army manoeuvres and hung out for days.

The foreign office where in touch, as my girlfriend had an opportunity to pretend to be concerned for ultimate attention as she was back in the UK. ( she actually cheated on me again, during this time). My Dad however was hopeless in his attempts to get me out.

Now the borders are closed, diving is off as the decompression chamber is in Israel, so we had nothing to do other than venture out.

So we did, we took a ride to the most perfect beach with giant man made beach huts and a beach which included one metre off a drop of 80 metre of coral and some of the craziest sights ever seen in the Red Sea.

We then took a boat trip with some Egyptian sailors and watching flying rays skim across the sea with grace and elegance.

We smoked shisha in a desert bedouin tent with some dodgy looking guys and a giant Russian, who no doubt was gun running.

I fed a dolphin, albeit part of my Tuna Sandwich whilst have lunch next to the sea.

One thing we did discuss, at great length was Football. In the Bar one Scotsman (Celtic) myself (Millwall) the Israelis (Tottenham) and the Egyptians (Liverpool, Manchester United and Arsenal). We even got to the stage of one of the barmen bringing in his best goals DVD and everyone re-rating with full debate their favourite goals. I still say Tony Yeboah's shot which went in from the underside of the bar was the best.

Things in the hotel became quieter, the only arrivals were UN peacekeepers and they were not feeling our little club.

The borders opened on September 18th and although the planned trip to Petra was culturally the better idea, going to Eilat on the piss with our new Israeli friends seemed the better option.

So there we were in a large gay club in Eilat, where 3 hours before a car bomb had killed several people, watching a drag act without a care in the world.

The next day we left, I got my passport and then everything was serious again. When I was in Eilat's airport I was singled out for questioning and made to sit on the floor cross-legged with my hands on my head, being mildly interrogated by Mossad. I was allowed on the plane.

During the flight, we were diverted to Larnaca where the British army searched the plane, whilst again. Hands on head and sit on the tarmac.

I arrived at Luton Airport and the rest is history.

There is a moral to this story, but it just does not matter.......


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Location:Fountain Ln,,United Kingdom

Twitter v's Facebook

I loved Facebook, had it back in the day when you threw sheep at each other , had inane status updates and created random group pages.

However over the years it has turned into just pictures of cats, memes, marketing for companies, copious amounts of invasive and addictive games and general celebrity nonsense.

Do not get me wrong animal pics are cute, memes are amusing. Although the Keep Calm and ........ Is all played out so STOP IT!

Its just, I like to use it just to see how friends and family are doing. In the good old days, if a friend was upset you could see their status straight away and pick them up. It is nice just to show you care, and you could use for the same purpose.

You got to see straight away, without effort pictures and the interaction was exciting.

The key word there, is without effort. You have to search for people now in between promoted wall posts and you just do not notice anymore. This has reverted back to pre facebook.

For a while social networking exploded into a utopian dream, we where all connected and loved hearing about someone whom I may only have shared a couple of passing sentences 20 years ago exploding with pride over their child achievement as we shared in that joy.

I do not believe it is all facebook as we changed from desktops to laptops, to mobile devices and tablets. We just do not have the interface to do what we liked to do.

I now use twitter, all my siblings are on twitter and have a direct line to them, all my posts are on twitter and they feed back onto facebook.

Everyone who I want to follow, I do and love hearing the inane ramblings, simple pictures and web links for new songs, music, videos etc..

I buy tickets through twitter, catch up on gigs, gossip and generally only have to view one platform to obtain all of my information.

One day, when facebook has left the corporate adventure it may revert back to its true purpose.

I have so much difficulty erasing mistakes of past groups that I have joined, people that I have friended (who, I do not even know).

Do not get me wrong, have met some fantastic people on there, some who I am close to and some reconnections have been very special.

I just want that back.

Now, I will be flooded with cats pictures and Zynga requests, but when the rapture comes you will be punished ; )

Follow me on twitter @scotteverest


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Location:Trafalgar Rd,Colchester,United Kingdom

Chap Hop

Greetings,

To all that know me understand that I have a penchant for the dramatic with a vampiric, gothic and steampunk twist.

A character train which people find confusing, my latest foray into the inane and unbelievable has led me to Chap Hop.

I overheard some recently at a comedy night and it resonated with me so I investigated.

The first artist for me to discover was Professor Elemental and his song 'Fighting Trousers' check out
Fight trousers

This upon listening was a diss song to Mr B The Gentleman Rhymer, which upon watching and listening is verging the ridiculous, which of course is the appeal.

It does make me yearn for such times, where an insult can be measured by the statement of 'I don't like your tweed Sir'.

Am I wrong to be drawn to the Steampunk world of curiousness? I am even considering relaunching my rap career with the Steampunk / Chap gimmick, however feel that a Jack the Ripper Horrorcore theme would be closer to my preferred style.

However I would just end up as a parody of The Mighty Boosh's 'The Hitcher' which may not be a bad thing but plagiarism all the same.

I am giving this some thought and already have a few stage names ready.

Tally ho cockle chops

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Location:Trafalgar Rd,Colchester,United Kingdom

Julian Assange

I think everything has gotten a little out of control.

The situation is quite sad, my worry is that his supporters have engineered this whole situation when the still is a doubt if he is a rapist or not?

This is the point, to eliminate any doubts you must face the legal system and the whole issue is a slight against the Swedish justice system and as a Sovereign nation.

As you can imagine the situation with the Falklands is another political minefield on the international stage, and to add Ecuador to the mix would make us quite unpopular in South America if we forcibly removed Assange.

The only outcome will be a long wait, and can see the 25th anniversary of Julian Assange hiding in the Embassy benefit gig now!

Ecuador has exports mainly of crude oil 47% and Bananas 14%, which the latter mostly hitting our supermarkets. So an embargo would be effective along with other sanctions.

If the US and UK placed sanctions onto Ecuador the surplus would drive down prices and create a South American recession. Now solidarity within the Americas is not to be tested at the price of a trophy asset or political amusement.

Imagine for one moment that it was your daughter that Julian Assange allegedly raped or sexually assaulted, how would you feel about the behaviour of the celebrities who support him and the nations of South America who want to protect him?

Now if he is innocent then what does he have to fear? Extradition to the USA is the answer.

The question that needs to be asked is that if he is wanted for supplying information that lead to the death of US soldiers, why is there not an international warrant for his arrest? Is this threat real?

Surely when the UK handed over its own citizens (Aspergers hacker) then it would have no issues with a foreign national (Assange)?

To put some contrast to the debate, we cannot even extradite Abu Hamza or Abu Qatada?

What do you think?

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Location:Colchester,United Kingdom

On the injured list

When one has a holiday you expect abundant joy, relaxation and memories that last forever.

It is with regret that laying in bed 6pm on a Friday with an injured ankle and calf is not festive and joyful.

When you are ill and in the clutches of Apple you find yourself searching through free Apps. I recommend Netflix and Earth porn with the latter quite a delight, albeit not a sordid one.

I am back to work Tuesday, and naturally will be fully recovered by then as I await my scan results with a promise of private Bupa massage and physio by amazonian swedish Beauties my only salvation.

Looking forward to the Paralympics and the swell of national pride and displays of 'The Jack' are reminiscent of a bygone age.

Now if some without a leg can achieve what they do, then there is hope for me and my gammy ankle!

Toodle pip until next time and remember .......

'If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything' as I lay here thinking.



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Location:My bed

The butterfly and the Rain Cloud

The butterfly and the rain cloud

One glorious sunrise many moons ago, in the depths of the bountiful jade and emerald forest the only butterfly ever was born.

Her colours irridedescent again the morning rays, caused sparkling wonder upon every reflection. The arrival was greeted amongst all the other species as a true beauty born to them.

For many happy years, the butterfly flutted her wings in the lush tropical forest with all creatures of amazing vibrant colours. Her life was idyllic, but she did not feel whole.

She was in paradise, but one day she flutters her way to the tallest tree and could see the vistas of yonder. The sky was always blue as was all the primary boldness of all she accounted; however on the horizon she saw something. It was a grey rain cloud.

The butterfly had never seen a rain cloud, although the colours did not match her utopia, she felt pity and feared for its loneliness.

The cloud never moved and for days, weeks, months she climbed to the highest point on the roof the forest and watched the rain cloud.

A decision was made to seek out this rain cloud and to convince it to come with her back to her paradise.

So one morning she set off in the direction of the cloud, every so often in her journey she would have to rise above the canopy to check her course.

The forest was dense and grey, no signs of life or colours, this was not like her paradise.

The closer she got to the rain cloud, the light darkened and rain fell upon her wings. The weight of the rain caused problems for her to fly. It then quickly came to her that the rain cloud did not want her there.

It was at that moment that she decided to turn back, the journey and return to paradise was a welcome one and she scolded herself for wanting better as she truly did not want to leave ever again.

Some more days passed and the rain cloud drifted away, the morning sun penetrated the dense canopy where the cloud once was. The forest floor began to rumble and almost arriving with trumpets the stalks of tropical flowers burst through the sodden earth. These flowers bloomed with glorious colours.

The leaves of luscious green returned to the trees, after one more day these leaves were gone, consumed by thousands upon thousands of caterpillars.

Almost in unison they all formed cocoons and when the time was right they all was reborn, the fluttering of all their wings brought a crescendo wave that swept the forest.

The butterfly in her paradise heard this noise, and thought to herself that if the rain cloud came, she would move in the opposite direction.    

A blog about a hidden Scandal

Fellow humans, welcome to my weekly blog.

A provocative title indeed, but let me tell you a story.

There once was CEO on a six figure salary who had an army of PA's all on £40k+, he had modern multi million pound offices, he commissioned art, he worked a 24 hour week, he had expense accounts, he had celebrity endorsements (all expenses paid), he had street teams raising capital on £14 per hour + commission.

Are we talking a finely tuned financial institution? No we are talking charities!

I will not rant on this subject as I am about to digress, but did you know that the majority of charities only actually donate £0.32 in the £1.00 raised? Or 68% operating costs.

There are operating costs, but this does seem maybe ...... Excessive?

The scandal for which I speak, is actually the misuse of funds raised. The example which is to be used are the purchasing of special needs toys.

We buy our Son all of his toys, as I am in a position to do so, however there are families and special needs nurseries / schools who do not have the funds available and need help.

Now, you would think that these would be made available with a small mark up but with VAT removed (as its a charity) the prices would be reasonable? wrong.

A great example was a simple red crab toy, it helps aid crawling, you wind it up and it stimulates the observer to chase it. Well this breakthrough in special needs toys was available for £40.00. If it had the desired effect then price is no object, right?

However, there was something about this toy that did not make sense, and it was not until I saw the same toy, and I mean the same in Tesco's priced at £5.00 then the scandal was obvious.

This is how it works, a special needs toy supplier sells it's wares to charities at the high price, this is auditable. The charity then supplies councils and school's, but mostly schools or playgroups. The charity then as a middle man would receive a rebate from the supplier. This of course will be marked down as a donation.

Thus the cycle starts again, the supplier could go direct but how much more business would they get if they partnered with a charity?

Then there is the council, who via a large grant from a charity will give a family, use of a wheelchair or walking frame? They purchase from a supplier, then place a large mark up for a charity to part buy. In the majority of cases the family has had to fund raise to buy the other half with donations matched?

Does the child get a wheelchair, well yes, but is this ethical? when half of the funds raised would of more than matched the actual cost of the wheelchair if the family had access to the supplier.

A very modern scandal indeed as our donations are wasted, our council tax is squandered, our special needs nurseries and play groups ripped off, parents forced to wait as they struggle to raise funds that would more than pay for the item if they knew the supplier.

So the next time you donate to charity, find out how many pence to the pound is actually being used to help people. You may get a shock!

Or just take used (and cleaned) toys along to playgroups and schools, they could sure use the help.

We had lots of used frames, baths, walking aids but would they take them back to help other families? Hmmm ..... Eventually but we had to ask them, maybe more than once.

No charities were named for legal reasons, but would more than happily tell you who they are in an unrecorded private conversation.

You could spend ten's of thousands of pounds for my son to have sensory toys, but a 99p foil hand held windmill from the seaside would bring equal joy.

I hope the special needs toy suppliers do not read this, as seaside foil windmills will increase in price 20 fold, so shushhhhhh...............


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Less is more

Hola,

I did the garden on Monday, the first cut of grass since winter, not my favourite task but it needed doing. My daughter decided to help and wrote me a to do list in her Hello Kitty notebook, which included cooking a roast dinner. Now that is extreme gardening!

So whats new?

I received some great career advice last week, sometimes feedback, however cruel, can be helpful and insightful if delivered correctly. (it was)

One thing I did realise that when your in a state of stress, you can no longer pretend to fake your persona, so your true personality will always come through. (the old Scott would of put a dig here)

A sense of comfort came across me when serial killers are often described as "well they seemed so nice and friendly, would never had known?"

For me, its always written all over my face (not mass murder) what I am thinking.

I need a break, a true break, to read a book, write or just do something else for me? (not mass murder)

I do feel liberated though, a sense of non purpose that will allow me to walk through the raindrops as the rain has no reason to fall on me.

There will be some initial comeback and to quote Nathan Barley "today ridicule, tomorrow really cool"

So what does that mean? Well nothing, as I cant think of a context, but the sniping cannot hurt when the antagonist has no gun.

I am not trying to be provocative, I do believe in myself and my team. The words defensive and protective have often described me, but a paternal instinct may work well within but will not be percieved well from the outside.

After three nonsensical quotes, nothing is clearer.

However the point is 'less is more' and doing what I do best, will lead me on the path towards success. Nothing more or nothing less.

To finish with a bite from a Scroobious Pip song,

"I saw a dead fish on the pavement, and thought what did you expect? Theres no water around here stupid you should of stayed where it was wet!"

Using less metaphors would be a good starting point.

Less nonsense more sense next week

Toodle pip



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A setback is a set up for a comeback

Hi Folks,

The title of this blog is a phrase that is a little over used, especially with regards to my career so far.

However, buzz words or phrases are actually no replacement for reality?

So tonight instead of enjoying a rose petal bath fragranced with the essence of lilly's, I will instead induldge in the practical reality of immersing myself is water with a cleaning additive for the purpose of removing sweat and detrius from the days hard labour, is what I should actually be saying!

Ok bitterness over.

This week my NVQ has been completed, a review of two documents with a summary was my last challenge

The obvious topic was whether Justin Beiber's new haircut removes his youthful allure, but instead opted for a lighter subject of Socialism Vs Capitalism.

Now this is not an opportunity to bore you (although tempting), but an obvious paradox did strike a chord. You cannot have a succesful business without a succesful team, with everyone pulling together in one direction for a common goal. Now achieving success is a capitalist mainstay, however it cannot be achieved without this socialist idealogy?

Also the second paradox being that free speech and the ability to promote socialist ideals can only be achieved by an individual in a capitalist society.

Maybe Justin Beiber was a more fitting subject, however I do enjoy stretching the NVQ assessors, my life goal is of course to associate my name with a verb, maybe she is cursing me as we speak.

This is my nature, maybe I just cant pretend to be someone else or adapt my character for 8 hours? However, maybe it would prevent many more setbacks if I could?

To atagonise is not so wise, to get further in life you must politicise, to win you must first have a prize and to get there you must be super nice ...... (I made that up- I have creativity!)

So back to soviet ideals and western greed. What is worse capitalists pretending to be socialists or vice versa?

Or should we all unite and be a Beleiber in everyone (see what I have done!!!!)

I am happy :) so sorry what am I thinking? My face signifies satisfaction due to a positive experience

To bend a quote from Obi-Wan Kenobi "I am not the droid you are looking for"

Tally Ho




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Location:Bishopsgate,London,United Kingdom

It has been a while!

Dear all,

It has certainly been a while since my last blog, it is scary how easy it is for inactivity to become habit.

So what is new and why the blog?

Well, with a need to keep the blogs as brief as possible these days I watched a program last night call the Anti-Social Network with Richard Bacon and it struck a chord.

The main reason that my blogs stopped was because of trolling. I liked to talk about my disabled son 'Johnnie' and you know what I do not even have to justify it. However, the troll did affect me.

There will be no trolling quotes, nor power given to them as they had crawled into there little troll hole, so I thought ...........

The troll obviously knows me, as last Monday they reappeared with the usual sick abuse. However, they must have known that Tuesday was a big day for me as I had been invited to a Development day with my work which would have shaped my future.

Did it get to me? yes it did. The day, was it ruined? well yes.

However, staying quiet was at the time the best option as you kind of want it to go away. Delete, block, report etc.... Can get rid of the message but the damage stays with you.

So, after watching that program it has given me hope as you can track them down. I believe a private detective is affordable, but would why waste money.

You then have to think about the troll, obviously they are mentally ill and probably a victim of bullying in the past? I feel that it is more complex rather than a cliche as I am not a profiler like 'Cracker'.

So, the only way for me to be free is to blog more, talk about my feelings more and just be happy.

I have always been the type of guy to dance naked in the rain surrounded by rainbows unicorns, however if you look towards the horizon there is a dark bridge under a rain cloud and there lives an evil bitter troll.

He hates me because he is jealous, due to me being totally gorgeous

Kiss Kiss

Scott - King of the rainbow


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